Friday, August 28, 2009

I Had a Dream . . .

Gooooooddddd morning, Blogosphere! I'm up (and functioning) at 4:47 AM CT. Not just up but I've already kissed my ladies goodbye (their slumbering foreheads at least) and I'm dressed and sipping some milk and preparing for a pre-work, pre-dawn walk.

Had (among) the weirdest dream(s) ever last night.

Wifey and I are heading back to DC next weekend for a former co-worker of Joy's nuptials and, needless to clarify, I'm SUPER excited and SUPER nervous about it. It will be WONDERFUL to get back "home" and to see friends but - a few hundred pounds lighter - I just worry a lot about how I really look and what people expect from the skinnier Sean (I'm hoping it is to share a seat on the Metro - something I couldn't really do for most of my years in DC).

So - this energy is of course trying to work itself out in the only place that I really wrestle with myself these days . . . in sleep! I'm prattling . . . here's the dream.

We decide to do a big happy hour (ironic since we've already ruled out even trying to do a big, group "thing") and when we get there and walk in . . . I'm Don Draper (and if you don't know who Don Draper is SHAME ON YOU!) and not just in fashion (how much do I wish I lived in the 60s with those killer styles) but in looks (to be as handsome as Jon Hamm - a true dream) and in attitude and in persona. But it is not received as awkward by the people who "knew me best" in my DCs days. It is not seen as funny or strange or endearing or wonderful. It just sort of IS. No one even seems to really put it together that when a guy loses 250+ pounds he doesn't morph in to a 60s creative director who intentionally lives a lie and seems to have no moral compass besides when pointing it at other people's shortcomings.

Totally random dream and here I sit, at 4:59, realizing that one week (from this moment) Joy and I will be leaving for the airport for our trip and I will have to figure out which version of Sean will land at BWI airport and come to peace with the fact that he "is who he is" and his friends, the few we will probably see in the grand scheme of thins, might think he looks and acts different but they won't confuse (or accept) him for Don Draper.

For better or for worse. I also had a dream about Christina Hendricks but that is a different story for a different blog. KIDDING! You know I only have eyes for you in the real world, Wifey!

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