Or - cue NONE of it. Here's the thing . . . I'm not a "birthday person" and I do not mean that in a "me thinks thou doest protest too much" way either - I mean I do not get birthdays. Don't care about them. Barely understand why any one cares about them and am very slow to even grumble a "happy birthday" to other people on their "special days" accordingly.
Nope. They're overrated EXCEPT that one fleeting moment every June 12th when I realize that I have lived another year. It usually happens while brushing my teeth (I also remark that I've lived another year with all of my teeth (long story)) and it usually sort of plays out in a "mental montage" of moments that would make any film an Oscar winner, if I had my say.
Here - for your review (and likely disposal) are my Ten Top and Ten Bottom moments of my 33rd year of life (techincally today starts my 34th year of life - I crunched the numbers so trust me). I ONLY included MY moments here (no mention of Ava or Joy here (lest anyone think neither of them are crucial to my every moment)).
Top Ten . . .
2 - Getting Below 250 Pounds and then to 225 Pounds - I am getting skinnier. I am 300 pounds lighter than I was just a few short years ago. This year has seen my weight loss slow, greatly, and my perspective on my weight grow, greatly. I can and will do this. I'm going to be fine. I'll get to my goal weight, eventually, I promise.
4 - Christmas with My Family - I got home. For a week. Sure we came home with a kid that looked and acted like an extra from The Exorcist but it was TOTALLY worth it for the seven days we had with my parents, five days with Ryan and the two glorious days I had with both of my brothers and with Joyell. I would do it again in a heartbeat. I'll skip church the next time though. No offense but that was AWKWARD!
5 - Getting a New President - I still think about what "coulda-been" with Hillary but I have come to really appreciate Obama and I've had a sip of the Kool-Aid. It wouldn't matter though. Bush is gone. We're better off. In the next four years there will be NO mistaking or disputing that. Sorry, Scooter, Rove and Cheney. It's just true.
6 - Getting the 18-Month "Journey" Over With - I'll admit it, now. I hated being under the microscope of my surgery. SURE - I had some great results and I worked very, very hard but it was something I got tired of talking about and being so "important" all the time. Life is better now. We eat where Joy and Ava want to eat. We buy groceries for the whole family. I don't feel like people are looking at me as a shrinking man any more. Life is just better now. I'm 27 months out. That's like an eternity. An eternity I'm happy to spend.
1 - Crushing My Finger In a Storm Window - This one just happened so it might not be that big of a deal but I literally CRUSHED three of my fingertips (nails, bones, nerves, etc.) in a storm window two weeks ago. Try having a desk job where you type for a living when you can barely move three of your ten digits without wincing. I like when God tries to make me humble. Keep trying, big guy!
2 - Having the Economy Hit Home - Half of Joy's cousins are out of work. Her father and uncle are going on furlough. Joy can't find a job in her profession. My friend Shelton, a very smart man, just found work after seven months of searching. I don't know anyone in this town that doesn't at least think about their job being secure from time to time. I don't like it. At all. I want everyone gainfully employed, happy, going on vacation and getting fat with joy. In the meantime there is always the reminder that life is precious, beautiful and rare and a job is not your life - it is a job and money is not all important. That being said - I LOVE my job. I WANT my job. I NEED my job. Enough already. Let's turn this economy around, smart people!
3 - Plateauing - I know I said I'm glad that my 18-months is over. I am. That being said, I don't like the plateau. I don't like that I have only gone down one pant size in the last six months. I was dropping two inches a MONTH there for a while. The weirdest part is that if your body is not getting smaller you feel like it is getting bigger and that makes me miserable. I'm on the way down again. Slowly. Surely. No more plateaus for me, please. Until I am at that 200 mark and stay there until the day I die (smile)!
4 - Nearly Dumping - I came very, very close to dumping this year. Twice, technically. Neither time was on purpose (I was not testing the limits of my sugar consumption - I was ignorantly taking on sugar assuming there was none in the food I was eating) and I didn't fully dump either time. There is nothing more scary to me - in this post-GB life - than sugar and dumping. I will never not be fearful of sugar. Never. I'm sweating right now just thinking about it.