Friday, May 1, 2009
Kickball . . .
Being the "fat kid" in school carries many, many stigmas and stereotypes with it.
- Last one picked
- Playing "Deep Left Out"
- Worst player on the field
- Kid eating a candy bar in the outfield
I'm sorta' proud (and yet kinda' embarrassed) to say that none of these things - except the candy bar thing (little league was suchhhhh B.S.) really applied to me when I was young.
I was sort of a fluke. Very, very heavy and yet not limited by my size (until post-college life). I played sports. I was flexible and spry and almost athletic (the speed was lacking but I could hit/catch/kick/throw the ball with limited problems) and I almost enjoyed playing games.
Let me be clear. I HATE sports. Always have. Always will. No offense to the men and women in the world that make millions a year playing them and the parents and kids in America that devote thousands of hours (and dollars) a year to youth sports and the pursuit of the status of professional athlete) but they are just GAMES, people. Nothing of true consequence. The world has never, ever been improved by a game. This is simple fact. I am not saying that everything I do with my time improves or betters the world (I watch a LOT of VH1 on DVR, for instance) but I just never wanted to really devote myself to something that I knew would eventually, for me, turn out to be a waste of time.
I would screw around with sports though. I am GREAT at three sports in this world. Bocce. Croquet. Mini Golf. NOT in that order either (I'll putt the pants off you - any windmill, any time). I am GOOD at a few other sports - mainly KICKBALL.
It is with great joy, accordingly, that I sit at my desk this Friday morning. You see we are going to play a game of inner-agency kickball this afternoon (weather and City of Wichita permitting).
This will be my first time participating in an "organized sport" in probably 12 years (I did intramural sports in college - waddup French Licks) and the first time I've participated in an organized sport in the low 200s since the eight grade or so.
I am praying the rain will clear - at least enough to let us field the game (a group of us here are willing to play no matter what but we need to have enough folks to really field two teams) because I've got myself some new shorts, some knee high socks, a disco ball necklace, a feather headdress and 45 agency logo printed t-shirts hot off the press and ready to be sweat in.
Fingers crossed. Groin stretched.
As they say on Friday Night Lights - "Clear eyes. Full hearts. Can't lose."