Wednesday, February 6, 2008

The Biggest Loser . . .

Last night's Biggest Loser was a peach, yes? As I mentioned in my brief thoughts last week - my favorite part about the many teams of two becoming just two large teams was good because it made all of the confidences and insecurities of the players so much more apparent.

The whole notion of the "couples" model was that you would have one person you could lean on and as long as you and that person leaned and worked - you would be safe and you would be secure. It was a security blanket that was warm and soft and cuddly.

But what of last night when we were reminded just how little soft and cuddle there really was in these new teams.

1 - Paul. Paul, Paul, Paul. You love Kelly but that ship has sailed, brother. She's helping you get your life back (as you pointed out) but she's got a new guy at home and she loves him and you've talked about your girlfriend in the past too. It might be time to understand that as long as you walk around with the "blanket" of your love for Kelly, you are not going to get fit and healthy and you won't lose the weight. Shed the blanket.

2 - Jay and Mark. Jay, my friend, when will you learn that your brother Mark is just a pirate? He's just an over the top, way too competitive, do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do maniac. The "chocolate caramel candy" temptation challenge (please, NBC, just call the ROLOs. All of us fat people at home watching know a Rolo when we see one - you don't even need to clarify they are chocolate caramel candies and to not use the proper name for the candy just wasted valuable time for the rest of us) proved that when he ate 43 of the little suckers just so he could NOT change the teams around. And no one feels bad for your stress fractured leg, oh Svengali of the Show. Just ride your bike, lose your 13 pounds, keep scheming and shut up. But Jay. Please. Lose the blanket. You are better than just being his younger brother. Respect yourself.

3 - Chastity. Oh Chastity. What you gun do? What you gun do without your mother there to cheer for you? I was, first off, impressed to see that Chastity's brother looks almost as much like Chastity as Chastity does. I will be very anxious to see where the swaggart goes without mother-Orange around (that's right - 1/2 of my favorite team because they wore my favorite color couple was sent home last night) but I hope you can overcome and battle on. You need to at see at least Mark or Jay go home - and their time is coming, right? Right? Anywho, your blanket is gone. Now get back to work.

The biggest "twists" in last night's episode was seeing how well the remaining half of the formerly-purple team responded to being "alone" (there is life on the ranch after your teammate goes home, Chastity) and, of course, the Rocco dinner where he didn't so much cook as pointed the team members towards the food they would make for themselves and, biggest twist of all, the SECURITY that Jackie felt just walking in to Trey and Roger's room and telling Trey he would go home and he would be fine only to walk to the brother's room and have them SWEAR ON THEIR CHILDREN'S LIVES that they would tell her before voting her off - only to turn around and vote her off. Security became insecurity and poor Jackie was left feeling very hurt and very alone.

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